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The World's Dumbest Article Used Me As Clickbait

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00:00   |   Apr 16, 2018

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The World's Dumbest Article Used Me As Clickbait
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Transcription

  • Hey guys, uh, welcome back to the Drew Gooden Show.
  • As you all know, in my last video, I taped a bunch of balloons..
  • ..To the ceiling.
  • And, uh, it's been about two weeks.
  • So... probably time to take them down. But-
  • I'm not just gonna take them down and throw them away.
  • I thought about it, I tried.
  • It didn't work.
  • You've gotta pop 'em.
  • To be honest, I don't really wanna pop the balloons...
  • ...cause I'm kinda scared of the sound they'll make when I do.
  • It's very loud, and frightening, and I'm fragile.
  • But- I remembered I have a YouTube channel.
  • And sometimes, as a YouTube creator,
  • You have to sacrifice your own wellbeing for the sake of good content.
  • And poppin' balloons makes good content.
  • Ok... I thought I could get, like, a sneak attack. Didn't work.
  • So. That's what we're going to be doing today. Are you ready? You ready, Amanda, are you rolling?
  • Amanda - Why are you using a spoon?
  • Huh? Oh the spoon- to pop the balloons.. were you not listening?
  • - Can you... use a knife?
  • *sigh* Amanda, I'm not gonna use a knife.
  • I.... I might hurt myself.
  • - You'll be fine.
  • Alright, just, trust me. I've done this before, it works.
  • [ Frustrated noises ]
  • I think the spoon's broken.
  • You know, spoon actually rhymes with balloon.
  • Not a lot of people know that.
  • [ Dramatically sad music plays ]
  • "Hey mister balloon, you're looking awfully cute today."
  • "Hmm, how 'bout a smooch?"
  • *smoochy noises*-- "POP."
  • - Drew, this is not gonna work. Just use a knife!
  • I'm not gonna use a knife, Amanda, you..
  • You know my uncle died when he sat on one..
  • - Fine, then let me do it.
  • Fine!
  • Drew: Just be careful, alrigh-- ahh!
  • [ Intense music & loud balloon-popping sounds ]
  • - Babe!
  • [ Loud balloon pop sound ] Ah! You're a monster!
  • - Yeah.. what are you going to do to it..?
  • [ Drew gasps ]
  • - They're dead, babe.. let them rest..
  • Two for one.
  • - You're really good at this...
  • Babe, thank you so much. I could not have done that without you, seriously.
  • You're a lifesaver.
  • But, umm..
  • Could you put that knife down now?
  • Cuz it's scaring me, and also get the fuck out of here so I can record the rest of the video
  • Hey little stinkers,
  • Welcome back to the changing-my-shirt-in-the-middle-of-a-sentence podcast
  • Uh, today's video is about
  • Nothing.
  • Well, no, not nothing
  • Um.. just not one thing.
  • More a series of little things.
  • Uh.. like this.
  • Why the fuck am I in this article?
  • This article is called "18 Women Reveal Their Jealous Ways."
  • Now, despite what my mug may tell you,
  • I'm not a woman.
  • I even have the testicle to prove it.
  • So why am I in this article?
  • Like, the other two pictures make sense.
  • There's a girl who's saying, "no reason for you to be snapping my boyfriend!"
  • And then there's another girl with a boy
  • And she's sayin' "All mine."
  • And then there's me in the middle
  • Uh.. just kind of looking off to the side.
  • I'm trying to understand, like, the correlation here..
  • It kind of looks like I'm looking at her..
  • And she's looking at me..
  • But is she telling ME not to snap her boyfriend?
  • Am I the one sn-- am I the one snapping her boyfriend?
  • Maybe you're thinking, "Drew, you must be IN this article somewhere"
  • "Maybe they reference one of your videos.. or they reference your relationship.."
  • No. They don't.
  • Also, this is, like, the stupidest article in the world.
  • It's just 18 different screenshots from the 'Whisper' app
  • Where you, like, say secrets but they're anonymous
  • And like, that's.. most of them are probably fake, because you can just say whatever.
  • But these are all so dumb.
  • And the commentary they follow it with is even worse.
  • [ Reads commentary ]
  • And then they explain it.
  • Who wrote this?
  • That's what.. th-- it said..
  • Okay, this one's actually kinda funny.
  • [ Laughing while reading the caption ]
  • Yeah.. so I scrolled through this entire article
  • I'm not in it.
  • I'll link to it in the description incase you want to double check, and..
  • ..Prove that I'm not in it.
  • Um, but I'm at the top.
  • And I just.. I'm so confused.
  • The only connection I seem to have to these guys
  • Is that TheTalko, which is the website this article is on,
  • Is part of the "Premium" network..
  • Which also includes TheThings.
  • Which is a channel I talked about in my last video.
  • Now, there's a chance that because I made a video about TheThings
  • I've now been algorithmically combined with TheThings
  • In some sort of Google image search, y'know,
  • Because of certain keywords
  • More likely than that, though,
  • And this is where my, uh, big ol' brain is coming in handy..
  • These guys are doing this on purpose. See,
  • They'd love it if a Big YouTube Celebrity™ made a video about them
  • And then... made another video about them.
  • They're just trying to provoke me so I talk about them,
  • But that's where you messed up, /TheThings/.
  • Cuz I'm smarter than that.
  • Yeah, I'm not even going to mention your channel once in this video.
  • And if I do, I'll at least have the hindsight to edit it out in post.
  • - Holy shit guys, I can't believe I almost left this part in without saying anything about it
  • - I was literally about to export this video
  • - And then I realized
  • - My shirt is untucked.
  • - I'm sorry, guys.
  • Now, I also made a video recently about a channel called Best Trends
  • The worst-- well, no, best Fortnite channel I've ever seen in my life
  • - Five Fortnite YouTubers.. who've sworn!
  • *gasp*
  • Unfortunately, though, tragedy struck a couple weeks ago
  • When, seemingly inexplicably,
  • His channel was terminated.
  • Now, apparently the reason he was suspended was because he was doing fake giveaways at the beginning of every video
  • Something that I didn't even touch on in my video
  • Because I assumed they were fake
  • But I didn't have hard evidence, so I didn't want to go after him for something I wasn't totally sure of
  • I kinda just wanted to focus on how funny he is.
  • BestTrends: I can't say it's funny, but... I gotta say it's pretty funny.
  • But yeah, he would literally start every video like this:
  • - For every like on this video, I'll be giving away one V-buck.
  • - So if this video gets 10,000 likes, I'll be giving away 10,000 V-bucks.
  • And it should have been really obvious to me that they were fake
  • Because of how much he was actually promising
  • Like, I even stopped to do the math
  • "For every like on this video, I'll give away one V-buck,"
  • So 10,000 likes equals 10,000 V-bucks
  • Which would cost over 1,000 dollars
  • You multiply that throughout all of his videos
  • I think he would have had to spend about 20- 25,000 dollars
  • To make good on all his giveaways.
  • The worst part, though, is that not only was it a fake giveaway,
  • But the whole basis of the giveaway was like,
  • "You will be entered to win if you like, subscribe, turn on the notifications, and comment."
  • Y'know, if you do all the things that manipulate the YouTube algorithm
  • Into pushing your video more
  • Because they just see the statistics of, like,
  • "Oh, people really like this video, they're really engaging with this video."
  • So, it's a total scam, he's not the only one who's done it
  • He's not the only one who's gotten his account shut down for it
  • /But/
  • He's back. [ Applause ]
  • Yeah. You can't stop Best Trends
  • Nothing's gonna keep Best Trends down
  • Um.. he's back.
  • Now, unfortunately for him,
  • He had over a million subscribers,
  • Which he had earned in a very short amount of time
  • He got very cocky
  • To the point where he made a second channel
  • Where he was gonna promise that he would teach everybody all the 'tips and tricks' to becoming a famous YouTuber
  • Y'know, the irony of that is, a week later,
  • He's no longer a famous YouTuber.
  • But he has improved in one important aspect
  • See, remember my last video about him
  • Where I was saying how he put
  • Four mid-rolls in every 10-minute video, meaning
  • Uh, one ad every two and a half minutes
  • Which is way too many ads
  • He has managed not just to one-up himself, but
  • Six-up himself?
  • Yeah, that's right, he does 10 mid-rolls now.
  • And honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if I was the one who gave him the idea.
  • And proving that he's a master of not learning from his own mistakes,
  • He's STILL doing the fake giveaways!
  • [ Game show music with applause ]
  • This video is called "Pokimane thicc and best hot moments"
  • "Pokimane twitch highlights, Pokimane kiss myth"
  • When does this guy NOT have a way with words?
  • - Because.. he's a legend.
  • [ Sad trumpet song ]
  • And now...
  • A moment of silence..
  • To pay respect to our fallen comrade
  • Yes, I put a hat on just for this bit.
  • - Hold up! Pause the video
  • It's time to tell you guys about today's sponsor.
  • - Raisins.
  • Thank you so much to Raisins for sponsoring today's video
  • Guys, this was going to be the end
  • I actually had some flat earth theories I was going to throw around, but I'll save those for another time
  • Because something even bigger came up
  • Just after I finished editing this video,
  • I went on YouTube and realized Best Trends has his account back.
  • [ Confused noise ]
  • I can't keep up!
  • First I make a video about a guy and then he gets his account terminated
  • For something I didn't mention in my video
  • So I make a follow-up video about how he got his account terminated
  • And he started a new account
  • And then while I'm making that video,
  • His new account gets deleted because he doesn't need it anymore
  • Because his old account got reinstated
  • So now he's back on that.
  • I'm worried, though, that by the time that I finish editing THIS part of the video,
  • He'll get his account deleted again
  • And then I'll look like a dang fool.
  • The bigger problem is, why does it take me so long to edit my videos?
  • I should work harder.
  • I should work harder.
  • I don't know if it was a temporary ban,
  • Or if he just got someone at Youtube to reinstate him,
  • He clearly broke the rules so I don't know why he got his account back
  • All I will say is, if you are as invested in this saga as I am,
  • Um, watch his most recent video, I'm going to put the link in the description
  • Where he-- It was supposed to be this alleged proof
  • Of all the, uh, all the V-bucks he's giving away, right
  • The first thing about this that's, uh, fishy though,
  • Is that he kind of changes the rules in the beginning.
  • BestTrends: So guys, we are running a giveaway, and it was one like equals one V-buck.
  • And how this giveaway was working is
  • Out of all the videos, whichever video had the most likes, we would give away that amount of V-bucks.
  • So right now on the screen
  • We are showing our video that has the most likes.
  • - Originally, he said in every single video
  • That he would be giving away one V-buck per like.
  • So, uh, any logical, reasonable person would hear that and think,
  • He's going to add up all of the likes in all of the videos and give away that many V-bucks, right?
  • But then he decided that the only number of likes that mattered was
  • The one with the most likes.
  • And that that would encompass the entire giveaway.
  • Also, why is it this one video, that was posted after every video,
  • Months after many of them,
  • This is the only instance where he's actually doing the giveaway
  • Which means-- it actually proves that, for months,
  • He wasn't making good on what he was promising.
  • He was lying to manipulate the YouTube algorithm.
  • It's funny that this was his last video he posted before getting banned
  • It's almost like this video, that he made just to prove
  • That he was doing these giveaways
  • Is the thing that shown a spotlight on him
  • From YouTube, that showed YouTube, "Hey, this is all fake"
  • The irony there, that he was getting away with it for so long
  • Until he tried to prove it, that's when they realized he was full of sh*t.
  • Now, I'm honestly going to be very heavily invested in Best Trends
  • For the rest of my life.
  • Um, I don't know why,
  • There's something about him I just find intoxicating
  • - I don't know what I'm even saying anymore.
  • - If you want a good laugh, I'd recommend watching his most recent video
  • BestTrends: Boo boom boom boom, cha-ching
  • Fortnite.. Battle Royyyyaaalllleee
  • - Anyways guys, I think that's going to do it for today's video
  • Just want to touch on those few things, follow up on some past videos
  • Uh, so all the true fans out there
  • Who are curious what comes of the things I talk about
  • Well, there's-- sometimes, there's other things that happen,
  • And now, so-- now you know about it.
  • I drank a lot of coffee this morning,
  • And I can't tell if the increased speed at which I'm talking
  • Is making me sound smarter, or just sound like a crazy person who's on cocaine.
  • /Spoiler Alert/ I'm not on cocaine..
  • I've never done th-- I've never done that.
  • The only thing I'm addicted to is hard work,
  • Loving my wife,
  • And opioids.
  • But that's it, Little Stinkers,
  • Got a big merch announcement coming in my next video
  • People have been asking me when I'm gonna restock my merch store,
  • When I'm going to have, y'know, actual merch,
  • Even though I think I have been selling actual merch
  • It's top-of-the-line stuff, very useful products
  • I mean, come on, like you're going to tell me these aren't practical?!
  • They're not, but it just makes for a funny Instagram post.
  • But I will be releasing a whole new batch of merch
  • This month, keep your eyes out for that
  • Drewgoodenshop.com
  • Also, I will be at Playlist Live Orlando in a couple weeks
  • Go to Playlist's website if you're interested in buying tickets
  • If you want to meet me, if you want to see a panel,
  • If you want to meet other people
  • I'm not going to be the only one there, so check it out.
  • It's local-- well, if you live in Florida like I do, it's local.
  • if you live somewhere else, you gotta go pretty far.
  • So that kinda sucks. But it's local for me, I'll be there
  • Hope to see you guys there, buy tickets soon
  • Before they sell out. I think they will. I think that's a thing.
  • I don't know. I've never been to Playlist before!
  • I'm excited. So excited I'm spitting.
  • Goodbye!
  • - Um, to be honest, I'm a little scared to pop the balloons
  • Because I don't like the sound that they make when they pop
  • Um.. what would you call that sound, babe?
  • Amanda: *cute popping sound*

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Description

In this video I talk about an article I have no business being in, I follow up on the enigmatic fortnite youtuber Best Trends, and Amanda helps me pop all the balloons I bought.

Don't worry, I'm not going to make a habit out of talking about the same guy this much, I just found the whole Best Trends saga to be fascinating, even if no one else does. But this is the end of it from my end, I promise. Unless he likes kicks my ass or something, then I'll probably wanna talk about that.

the really good article:
►https://www.thetalko.com/18-women-reveal-their-jealous-ways/?view=all

(for reference)
my video about the things:
►/watch?v=igMQJBgHRuo

my video about best trends:
►/watch?v=BhiuVWaajaM

----------------------------------------------------------------------

new merch this week:
https://www.drewgoodenshop.com/

follow amanda:
twitter - https://www.twitter.com/amananananda
instagram - https://www.instagram.com/amandaclairephoto

follow me (not clickbait):
twitter - https://www.twitter.com/drewisgooden
instagram - https://www.instagram.com/drewisgooden
facebook - https://www.facebook.com/drewisgooden

get tix to playlist:
https://www.playlist-live.com/orl-tickets/products

my playlist schedule:
Saturday, 2:30pm - I'm doing a panel about what to do when you're first starting on youtube
Sunday AM - My meet & greet. I'm in meetup group 36

and remember to use my promo code "raisin" to get 100 raisins. comment below how much you love raisin