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Aziz Ansari and Jimmy Dramatically Read More Bad Yelp Reviews

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07:44   |   May 09, 2017

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Aziz Ansari and Jimmy Dramatically Read More Bad Yelp Reviews
Aziz Ansari and Jimmy Dramatically Read More Bad Yelp Reviews thumb Aziz Ansari and Jimmy Dramatically Read More Bad Yelp Reviews thumb Aziz Ansari and Jimmy Dramatically Read More Bad Yelp Reviews thumb

Transcription

  • ♪ Dramatic Yelp Reviews ♪
  • -Now, you should know that all these Yelp reviews and responses
  • are 100% real.
  • For each of these, I'll be playing the customer,
  • and Aziz will be playing the owner, okay?
  • [ Clears throat ]
  • Here's the first one.
  • I'll get in character.
  • [ Dramatic music plays ]
  • [ Light laughter ]
  • [ Laughter and applause ]
  • [ Laughter ]
  • [ Cheers and applause ]
  • What?
  • -Wow.
  • -Wow!
  • Whoa! My bad.
  • -That got heated -- That got heated fast.
  • -Real quick.
  • Whoa.
  • That's the owner saying that.
  • All right, here we go.
  • Whew.
  • Let's do another one here.
  • -All right.
  • [ Dramatic music plays ]
  • [ Light laughter ]
  • -[ Scoffs ]
  • [ Laughter ]
  • [ Laughter and applause ]
  • [ Laughter, cheers, applause ]
  • -That would be good
  • if they did sign up for that loyalty program.
  • [ Both laugh ]
  • All right, so we switched it up a little bit on this next one.
  • This one is for a dentist's office.
  • -Oh.
  • Okay.
  • -Yeah.
  • [ Dramatic music plays ]
  • [ Laughter ]
  • [ Laughter ]
  • [ Laughter, cheers, applause ]
  • -Ooh!
  • Ohh!
  • All right.
  • I -- I feel like any film
  • where within the first five minutes
  • there's topless women "prancing around,"
  • it's pretty apparent from the cover that's what you're in for.
  • [ Laughter ]
  • -Exactly.
  • I-I don't even know -- Yeah.
  • Why would you even --
  • Well, why would you choose that film?
  • -Also, if you're the dentist,
  • just take the one with nudity out.
  • [ Laughter ]
  • Who's like, "You got anything with a little nudity,
  • maybe a little Diane Lane 'Unfaithful' action?
  • I want to see a little
  • bonin' while I'm getting my cavity filled."
  • [ Laughter ]
  • You can say "boning"!
  • [ Laughter ]
  • -No. -They're not bleeping --
  • You don't need to bleep -- You don't --
  • If anyone here is a guest on a late-night talk show,
  • just so you know,
  • "boning" doesn't need to be bleeped, as far as I know.
  • [ Laughter ]
  • -I don't know for a fact.
  • -I wonder what's happening at home right now.
  • Is that being bleeped?
  • Do they know what I'm saying?
  • -No, we describe it as something else --
  • -Spelled B-O-N-I-N-G.
  • [ Laughter and applause ]
  • -And it involves --
  • the definition is taking a bone out of a steak.
  • -Yes, exactly.
  • [ Laughter ]
  • -Legally, I think, now we can say "boning."
  • [ Laughter ]
  • If you give it --
  • No, it's when you take a bone and you shove it into a --
  • -Hey, hey, whoa, no, hey!
  • [ Laughter ]
  • -I mean, that would be de-boning.
  • -I just want to get my --
  • I just want to get my cavity filled.
  • That's all I...
  • [ Laughter ]
  • I didn't -- They made that joke.
  • I didn't make that joke.
  • -Exactly.
  • -You made it, yourself.
  • They made that joke themselves.
  • -We were talking about teeth.
  • We were talking about the dentist, teeth, exactly.
  • -Next time, we should actually get these people in here
  • so we can find out what really happened.
  • -Yeah, I would do that. I would do that.
  • Just want to see actually what happened.
  • 'Cause they're real people.
  • -I'd love to meet that crazy dentist.
  • [ Laughter ]
  • -Here we go. We have time for one more.
  • This one's actually from an auto-repair shop, okay?
  • [ Dramatic music plays ]
  • [ Laughter ]
  • [ Laughter ]
  • [ Cheers and applause ]
  • ♪♪
  • [ Laughter, cheers, applause ]
  • That is up for an Emmy Award, right there!
  • Aziz Ansari!

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Description

Aziz and Jimmy take turns reading real Yelp reviews and replies with a dramatic flourish.

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Aziz Ansari and Jimmy Dramatically Read More Bad Yelp Reviews
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